26 January 2015

Tough love, its the relationship with my practice.

Sharath once said, “ Yoga don’t need you. You need yoga.”

Yes, I humbly take his words for whatever I had been through in the past;
and of having glimpses of clarity of knowing myself better today.

We comfortably get ourselves into one distraction after another, to cover the issues from the previous. Including the accumulation of underlying issues--- giving us a false knowledge (ajnana) of                “ Everything is OK”.

Which give us a realisation of how much we have been cheating ourselves ( asatya).

My current teacher back home, James highlighted a point,
“ Make mistakes. But make different mistakes.”
He explained that there is no point repeating the same mistake, with each time deepening the incorrect impression (samsakra) in us. 

By making different mistakes, at least, we are holding an attitude of exploring possibilities into making things better or right. Through that, we are being push out of our comfortable zone, until we are set on a right direction---
We begin to deepen the positive habits that will eventually progress us (both in the practice & well- being).

We are all beggars in life.

Some begs for materials, some begs for attentions, some begs for love.
In one-way or another, we are beggars of our own desire--- to make ourselves feel better.

In which, there is no superiority or inferiority, we are all the same, isn’t it?
Tough love, its the relationship with my practice. The more I run, the more it pulls me back—putting me into a position to face my own delusions.

Peeling layers of misconceptions, like shedding layers of an onion.
Gaining more clarity gradually--- closing the distance between what it is and our perception;
Allowing truth (satya) to smack right into my face; and I stop playing with denials.

Hitting the rock bottom, a dead end. At the weakest point, the practice teaches us how to draw strength from weakness and move on.

Instilling us to uphold as much integrity in life by having us to work hard—just enough to draw the right amount of strength within us.

James cited, “ A strong support is important.” Many teachers emphasize the essentiality of being grounded. The deeper we root ourselves, the higher we grow—that takes time. 

So how rooted do we need?
How much strength should we acquire?

At this point, I concur…
Strong enough to reject those that doesn’t serve us anymore;
Strong enough to accept the unknown coming into our lives;
Strong enough to recognize whom we are and stay firmly to our beliefs in what we are doing now even the whole world turns there back against us.

That much of a strength, I’ll have to do more chaturanga….

14 January 2015

Drops of nectars from the bitterness of work.

Every trip to Mysore, i went back home a different person.
Having to experience two sides of a coin in quick period, being reflective is unavoidable.

Half way through my stay in Mysore, i'm almost hitting the brim of containing what i see everyday--- i'll probably be overflowing at the end of the trip.

In fact, every morning, we woke up from the same bed; a different person from the previous night.
We walked out through the shala door, as a different person who went in earlier. With every moment passed, we shed some skin and a new layer grows.

Perception deriving by experience changes gradually as we grow. The quality of an experience lies in our hands as a decision maker. In each situation, we have the capability to decide how we want to feel-- that goes to history stories too.

The time we put on the mat, is never wasted. It is a long-term investment into the remaining years we have many lifetimes. The drops of nectar sipped into our life subtly, so subtle that we may just miss it with the overwhelming bitterness of the practice.
Down the years, look at who we are now and the person we first started this spiritual practice, do you see the small pool of nectar? Can you smell the fragrance and taste the sweetness?

On a personal journey, the practice doesn't serve purely just an interest, its giving me more that i first asked. Its a space where enquiry and feedbacks happens ( like a moment of Arjuna & Krishna from the Bhagavad Geeta)--- a guide to life.
How i view the world yesteryears and today has changed, and is changing.

Life comes in many pieces, like a puzzle. The piece of spiritual path is like an open-ended question. It has not shape yet it takes shape in any form. From my level of understanding, its still remains a stranger to me.

Spiritual or not, i don't know. i believe there's a piece that governs the puzzle of life brings us beyond and to the unseen. In a matter of fact, i'm taking the practice to be a better person than who i was, and may the people who i met gets a share of the sweetness:)

22 December 2014

"Constructivity". Constructive Activity.

It had just passed midnight, and my plan to sleep was a flop. I just got myself a body scrub of ground coffee & coconut oil, i am wide awake if the caffeine is working through my skin pores right now. 

From my bedroom window, i can still hear my local neighbours having a serious conversation for the past one hour, and still going strong... The dogs in our neighbourhood seems like having a gang-meeting every night howling their trash out...( i'm adjusting to it).
Cheers to Moon day tomorrow, i can afford to stay up late. 

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone that time is lost by itself? That's probably the most beautiful moment that i appreciate. I call this moment of vacuum--- tick-tocking loses its presence, and everything we are engaging in is simply in the present. 

For this, i have to agree with Mitch Albom "  I prefer clocks broken." in his book The Time Keeper. 

Constructive engagements.
This is probably my intention for this trip to Mysore. 
For sure i am different person today, as compared to who i was when i first came to Mysore in 2009.

As Sharath mentioned in one of his yoga conference, " Everyone comes to Mysore with different reasons and intentions." I agree. 
My underlying intentions in each trip i made changes as i grow over the years. 

Earlier, it was more of exploration, fun and exciting. This time, i feel different--- i want to laser beam into my practice and learning to be appreciative with the whole experience and the relationships i build here. 

I become selective for whatever i am putting my energy into. 
Constructive engagements i call.
Activities and conversation that may grow me into a better person than i am now. 
Share with me something that i don't know, i'm interested to know. 

Yes, i do meet some great people here who build conducive relationships to create positive ripples. Some practice yoga, and quite a big handful do not--- something that i really love about. 

You can't be without people. You can't be with people~ Sadhguru 

I'm very pro to the idea of being able to invest some time alone for ourselves. 
That's the time when most external distractions quieten down, the silence seeps into us and we listen to our own voice. 

I'm a people person but first i learn to check out what kind of person i am---- 
That happens when i spend enough time knowing myself.
Because, i do not wish to having friends as being each other hole-fillers. 

I prefer friendships and relationships that nurture one another a better person that we first met:)