04 June 2015

When success lies in the tries of many failures, would you still do it?

Jump and fall over. Just fall over.

This is what my teacher would always say. Always.

My both palms flat on the mat.
Head lifted just enough to focus my gaze at an invisible spot just at the top center in between the palms, forming a triangle.
Beads of sweat eagerly skiing down my nose bridge. Every breath carried a great deal of intensity.

 Ok. All i have to do is to bring my both feet.. from behind my palms to the front. 
So, if i miss the balance on the handstand, i will end up with a backbend.

I rehearsed what could possibly happen when i take that flight.
Replayed it many times mentally. A few more times quickly when i was making last-min adjustment to my hands--- just to get the most comfortable position.

The fear of falling can be quite choking.
But being afraid of that fear ( of falling) is worst.

I jumped. Past by the balance point. Fell over to the over side.

Oh...OK. That's not too bad actually. Not that frightening as what I've imagained. 

I stood up and smiled at my teacher.

The time you jump both feet off, few things may possibly happen.

If you landed back to where you started... OK.
If you managed to balance in that handstand... OK.
If you fall over to the other side... OK.

Don't make it a big deal. Just try again.

When you try, things happen, shit happens too. 
If you don't try, to be sure, nothing will happen. 


27 May 2015

Transiting through daily news: All these too shall pass

It's one of those days, transporting myself from one place to another.
The time spent in carriages has occupied much of my schedule.
While the whole transiting are happening, i took out my 5s nonchalantly like anyone did.

Just having the palm-sized phone in my right hand, i operated those functions like a pro.
As my thumb swiftly swished in a vertical motion lightly across the screen---- i glanced speedily for a quick updates about the news around the globe.
Good news. Bad news. Good news. Bad news. Bad news. Bad news. Good news. Good news. 

And I thought. 

Just at any one time, somebody is causing harm.. 
Another person, somewhere out there, is giving love.

Within breaths, someone is born....
And another being touches death. 

In some corners, some are crying in sorrow...
Others are tearing in joy.

A handful fell...
A few rose.

The universe does has it own way to keep everything in balance.

Every wickedness creates opportunity for kindness.
Every decency crafts a gap for immoral.

What we fail to see, does not determined any conclusion.
Why not drop those frames in our mind... and let's see?

Everything is transient. The only unchanging element is transient.
Just like how we transport ourselves from different locations.

As my cousin used to say: And all these too shall pass.

21 May 2015

We are not alone. So do you.

Here I am sitting at my favorite kind of table. Thick wooden. Angular and big.
The fact is that I’m only using a 1/10 of the whole piece. The remaining 9/10 is pretty relaxing to just look at.

But nope, I’m not at Starbucks. I'm caving in at a homely studio along East Coast Road. Much earlier before my class starts at 7pm.

Settling myself in to write or read something after a busy day since morning.

It was indeed a hot day today. I’ve taken too much train rides recently. I opted for the longer route by bus. Don’t know since when, I started to develop a habit of taking different options.

My bad sense of direction hasn’t been very helpful at all.  
All I can say is---
My duration of being walking up and down the same street has shortened. A little.

Bumpy bus ride. Body temperature went down gradually. My eyes were gazing at the passing streets.
At the back of my mind when passively alert, minimizing my chances of getting down at the wrong stop. The low buzzing engine was hypnotizing. I nearly dozed off.

Spacing out--- a heap of thoughts poured in…

I am not good enough.

Why my other friends seem to have perfect lives, but here I am being so unhappy about mine?

Why everyone looks so happy except me?

Why the others can have such a nice practice, but mine look so clumsy and messed up?

I’m not good enough.

But my dear students, how do you know?
Just how do you know that they are not?

How do you know how much effort they are putting in to manage the setbacks in life? The amount of effort they are putting in each of their practice?

We don’t know.
So stop. Just stop. 

Thus the justification of us victimizing ourselves is purely, a waste of time and effort. 
It’s zero helpfulness. Nothing.

Every one of us is carrying our own baggage of nonsense. Everyone.

Nobody don’t. We just like to pretend to be fine and happy all the time.

Every stranger we see on the street. If we speak to them long enough, you will know in this way--- we are indifference.
Once while I thought my problem was the biggest problem in the whole world.
Nobody would be experiencing that much pain than I did.

I was shamelessly wrong.

Next time if you feel like you have touched the dead-end.
Try this.
Hold your breath till you gasp.
There! This is life.

Where there is breath, there is life.
Where there is life, there is hope.

And so, every morning I wake up.
Learning to be grateful for being able to breathe at ease.

All others things that follow, is already a bonusJ